"Democracy is two wolves and a lamb deciding what's for lunch. Liberty is a well-armed lamb contesting the vote."

Here's your thousand words.

Don't ask.

Orville Redenbacher




Dr. Neil Clark Warren, founder of some dating site polluting the airwaves with its commercials

I've taken to calling the latter Evil Redenbacher.

The resemblance is enough to unblock a rhino's bowels.

John Leguizamo and David Spade both turned 41 today. Scary to think those guys (a) share a birthday and (b) are only three and a half years older than I am.

...AND...

Texas has the most hockey teams of any state in the union. (I'm assuming they're including AHL teams in that count.)

Texas, of all places.

What the puck.

What do you call a hitman with a short life expectancy?













A limited time offer.

"If you don't know Harold and the Purple Crayon, you can't be a real G."

I'm really digging 101 Even Bigger Celebrity Oops! on E! Hilarious stuff.

I must've missed an announcement, what with my sporadic LJ activity.

When the hell did my userpic limit go up to 100?

Jesus.

Some of you may have forgotten the Indy 500 was this weekend.



This is probably why you forgot.

Trauma will do that to you.

BEFORE

AFTER

R.I.P. Frank Gorshin

I'm bummed.

I don't know... it just seems to me that midget bukkake comes up short.

You have to admire their spunk, though.

Jeez. Y'all are still here?

Big Tex sure is into some different shit. Expect to see this in German scat porn in the near future.



Stephen Georgiou Cat Stevens Yusuf Islam Some dirty hippie demonstrates his own version of the Shocker, alternately called either the Camel Spider or the Chocolate Jihad.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!



Truth is sometimes funnier than fiction.

"In the hierarchy of artistic credibility, the Ironic Punk Cover falls somewhere just below erotic Harry Potter fan-fiction and just above Anne Geddes photography."

It's never too late to enjoy the Fourth of July. (Right-click and 'Save' recommended.)